After receiving literally hundreds of emails about yesterday's post being "too wordy" I have decided, out of an appreciation and respect for my readership, to pull this blog down from the bookshelf and take it back to the street. If your name is Jordan, I think you're going to love these instant classics:
Two guys walk into a bar. There is a monkey in a dinner jacket nursing a beer and two business women arguing about their periods. The bartender turns to the two men and says "What'll you have?" but before either one can answer they both slip in a hot pile of shit and fall directly onto their balls.
-Knock knock!
-Who's there?
-A greasy cocaine shit that surprises you in a restaurant!
Osama bin Laden is speaking before a congregation of terrorists, preparing them for another attack against the United States. "We will destroy the infidel!" he cries, raising his arms triumphantly. When the cheering subsides he opens his mouth to speak again but, before he can continue, one of the terrorists farts and he laughs so hard it hurts his penis.
Two shits walk into a toilet (which is brimming with shit) and the first shit says, "Tacoma, Washington is the best city in the world!" The second shit looks at him and says, "Man, I can't believe some of the shit that you say." At that very moment a droplet of toilet water splashes into the first shit's mouth and he starts to puke his guts out (his guts are made out of shit) into the already-crowded (with shit) toilet. Everyone at this point is having a good laugh when, out of the brown, an elderly gentleman squats overhead and shits a bellyfull of cheap Vietnamese food into the bowl with such force that it makes him yell.
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2 comments:
Is that what the street is like? Gotta love those Tacoma shits... sounds like they party HARD.
I can't help but feel you're drawing on Gordo's dreams.
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